Anna Van Der Merwe, from Belfast, is graduating today with a degree in Children’s and Young People’s Nursing from Queen’s University Belfast – completing a journey shaped by love, loss and resilience, and carrying forward a commitment to honour her daughter’s memory. 

Anna’s daughter, Megan, was born with major medical complications affecting her brain and heart, and later developing scoliosis, epilepsy and other complex health challenges. She was completely dependent on her family, but her life was rich with meaning.  

Anna reflects on how her daughter’s strength shaped their family: 

“We were told she would live for five days, but she gifted us 12 unforgettable years. Her presence reshaped our family: every day became precious, every milestone a celebration. Carrying both the weight of anticipatory grief and the joy of her resilience taught us patience, strength and the true meaning of unconditional love, including the importance of being held by others when the burden felt too heavy.” 

The nurses who cared for her daughter would change the course of Anna’s life. Their compassion, she says, inspired her calling to retrain as a nurse at Queen’s, having previously worked with creditors and debtors before becoming a full-time carer for Megan for those 12 years. 

Anna remembers vividly:  

“The nurses who walked alongside us didn’t just care for my daughter – they cared for us as a family. They showed us dignity in the darkest moments and humanity in the clinical setting. Studying nursing at Queen’s was not only about honouring my daughter’s legacy, but also something I needed to do for myself. It was a way of transforming grief into purpose, of finding meaning in the hardest chapters of my life.” 

Returning to education while carrying such profound memories was challenging, but ultimately empowering. 

As Anna explains: 

“At times, it felt like I was walking with two identities: the parent who had sat at the bedside, and the student nurse learning to stand at it professionally. Yet that duality became my strength. It gave me perspective and empathy, coupled with a determination to transform pain into purpose.” 

Throughout her studies, Queen’s offered the space and understanding she needed to grow personally and professionally. 

Anna describes how supported she felt during her training: 

“Queen’s provided not just academic rigour but a safe space where my story was heard and valued. Lecturers encouraged me to weave my story into my learning, wellbeing services provided a safety net when emotions surfaced, and my peers stood beside me with solidarity. Courses on end-of-life care, communication and trauma-informed practice gave me the tools to translate lived experience into professional skill. That support helped me understand that Queen’s gave me the academic foundation, but my daughter gave me the heart. Together, they shaped my decision to become the nurse I am today.” 

Anna’s lived experience became a meaningful source of connection for families she met on placement. One moment stands out: the day she heard a grieving parent inside a hospital room she had once struggled to enter while on placement because of her own memories. 

But stepping forward became a turning point for Anna: 

“Without a second thought, I knew I had to go in. I no longer associated the room with my own past. Instead, I saw this parent, and I appreciated the depth of her heartache. I felt empowered. It was the moment I truly understood that my daughter’s legacy had given me a gift: the ability to turn pain into empathy, and empathy into care.” 

Speaking to other students about end-of-life care also helped Anna understand the kind of nurse she wants to be, reinforcing that this work is not only grounded in clinical skill, but in the emotional connection and steady compassion families rely on. 

Graduation is a deeply emotional milestone for Anna, and is also a moment shared with her son, Ewan, who has been a constant source of strength. 

Anna says: 

“Walking across the graduation stage is not just a ceremony; it is the culmination of a journey carved out of love, loss and resilience. For me, it is carrying my daughter’s legacy in every step. And it was my son who reminded me that I could keep going when exhaustion or doubt crept in. Seeing him in the audience as I graduate will be a moment of profound pride, not just mine, but his too.” 

Now beginning her career as a paediatric community nurse, Anna hopes to specialise in palliative care: 

“Families need nurses who understand both the clinical and emotional landscapes of life-limiting conditions. My vision is to advocate for holistic, trauma‑informed, family‑centred support – ensuring no parent feels unseen, no child feels unheard. My long-term goal is to specialise in paediatric palliative care, shaping services that honour dignity, empathy, and humanity at every stage.” 

As she graduates, Anna carries her daughter’s legacy forward, not in memory alone, but in every act of care, every family she supports and every moment she transforms compassion into strength. 

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